We've officially adapted

Baby K on her first full day of creche- it also happened to be a game day for TCU

I am very happy to report that Baby K has made a smooth transition into nursery school. It's called creche here, and I have a hard time not calling it that since no one here is familiar with the terms nursery school or day care. I've mentioned before that Baby K has had a regular babysitter for the time I had been attending French school. This fall the babysitter started university, so she was no longer an option for us. Thankfully this happened right around the time Baby K was nearly 18-months old, the golden age for when you can finally enroll your child in a private creche and get off the public waiting list.

After moving to Montreux I quickly realized how much smaller it was than Basel. Before Baby K had come along, I visited five or six nursery schools in Basel, all of which had space for her for when she would be around six months old. When we moved to Montreux, it was a completely different story. I was informed that the commune (city) controlled the garderies (day care, starting at four-ish months) and you had to get on a list to get into one. The problem for us was that there are only a couple in Montreux, and we were at the bottom of the list due to only one parent working (and rightly so). So, a babysitter it was.

But now we've reached the age when it feels like many more doors open for your child. I have no idea if this is the case in the US, but it seems like it is here in Switzerland. For some reason when your child hits 18-months here, many other activities open up to them. I'm guessing it's because they are now officially in the toddler stage and are much more interactive? Not sure, but it's been good for us this month.

I toured a couple of creches before coming to the US in July, and reserved our spot at one that is about a 10-minute walk from our house. We chose a creche associated with a bilingual school, as hopefully this will be the case for Baby K. The creche part of the school is purely French speaking though, so she's immersed all day, two days per week. The school did not feel this would be detrimental to her English development since it's all English, all the time at home.

When starting creche here, each child and parent goes through an adaptation period to help the child adapt and get used to being at creche and away from their parent. Adaptation went like this for us:

• Monday: 30-minutes at creche, Baby K and I together
• Tuesday: 30-minutes Baby K by herself (from now on)
• Wednesday: One hour
• Thursday: Two hours, including snack time
• Monday: Three hours, including lunch
• Tuesday: Five hours, including naptime
• Thursday: Full day, pick up at 4pm

Now we're pretty much settled into the regular full day. There were other kids going through adaptation at the same time, and I swear the kids were crying every time I was there. Whereas, each time we arrived for some time at creche, Baby K pretty just waved and said see you later.

Each day when I pick her up, I get a report on what they've been up to that day, which usually includes a walk by the lake together, among other things. Right now she's still working on learning how to get a good nap at creche, as sleeping on a mat on the floor with other kids is new for her. They typically report that she is a bit fussy after naptime, but the other day the teacher giving me the report said she felt that this was quite normal when they were just starting, which made me feel better. Of course, the report is in French, which is also great practice for me.

For those of you who are wondering, I have no idea how a parent who works does the adaptation period. My guess would be that they either take off work, or a nanny/babysitter/grandparent takes and picks them up. Switzerland is not designed for two working parents, but that's a whole different post.

One other bonus...the school provides all of her meals while she's there, lunch and snack. I'm not sure why I like this so much, but maybe because I know she's getting a healthy hot meal for lunch, and I didn't have to make it! This is the norm here for all schools. I think I've seen one too many posts on how to change up your kid's boring school lunch, that makes it sound so tedious.

So there you have it. We've successfully gone through adaptation and I now have two afternoons free and am continuing French classes. Now you also know why I've managed to post three times this week :) Hope to see you again soon!

Collecting things along the way

It used to be shot glasses for BK, it's Christmas ornaments for my family, and now BK and I are working on a new collection to celebrate and remember our travels: paintings. For a while now, we've been collecting art from the destinations we visit. We've also started collecting little postcard size paintings for Baby K as well. I hope to make a book of them for her at some point.

We try to find a local artist who paints the city we're in, with some defining feature of the city in the painting. We've traveled a lot since moving to Europe, and are missing quite a few destinations, but are working on building our collection. We also typically try to just do one from each trip, not necessarily one from every destination. So for example, from our Spain and Portugal trip last spring (three destinations) we only bought one we liked in Lisbon. Here's what we have so far...

The beach we were married on in Maui

Napa Valley, by Kelly Sullivan at Sullivan Vineyards

Just off of De Grote Markt in Brussels, Belgium

Canals in Venice, Italy

Old Town Square in Prague, Czech Republic

Blue Mosque and Hagia Sophia in Istanbul, Turkey

Classic streetcar in Lisbon, Portugal

Landmarks throughout Barcelona, Spain

Collage of Berlin, Germany

So like I said, we have missed a few along the way, but make a point to try and find something we both like to represent the places we visit. We're very obviously missing Basel and Montreux, but are working on those and are kind of debating on what we want to do. For Montreux we're thinking about having someone paint the view from our terrace, as that's a pretty significant thing that we would like to have. We'll visit Basel numerous times in the upcoming months, so hopefully we can find something we like at some point before we leave Switzerland.

I also added these to our collection of maps and travel things around our house for our anniversary this year. They're not paintings, but something a little different. They are city maps of significant places for us with a note about why. Maui: where we tied the knot; Fort Worth: our first home together; Basel: our first move abroad; and Montreux: our second Swiss home. I know, I know, people have asked why Baby K isn't mentioned for Basel, but these are for BK and me, and she gets included in nearly everything else.

We're off to Munich next for Oktoberfest, and I'm sure we'll pick up another one to add to our collection. Who knows how many we'll eventually come home with...

I don't think lucky is the right word...

So. Darn. Cute.

I can't tell you how often people comment to BK and I how lucky we are with Baby K. It could be that they think we're lucky because she's a really happy baby, she loves to be around other kids, she's a good traveler, she's a great eater, she slept 12 hours per night at 12 weeks (and for long periods even before that)...the list goes on and on.

So yes, moral of the story, she is a good baby. When Baby K first came along, BK would ask me quite regularly, "What percent good baby do you think she is, versus her routine?" My response was typically: "95 percent routine, 5 percent good baby." He never bought it, but I think he's continually coming around.

I also write this on a day/weekend where I feel like I constantly had to check in with my go-to parenting resources. What to do when our sweet little 18-month old is squealing when she doesn't get her way, or cries for 30 minutes after her nap because it wasn't quite long enough...

I mostly check in with these because I need to be reminded to take a breath. She's 18-months old, and we'll make it though the day regardless of how long the time from nap time to bed time feels. But I know she can feel my frustration, so I try hard to keep it in check.

So, I thought I would share my go-tos. Not that I'm an expert or anything, but people sometimes ask, so here they are.

Babyproofing Your Marriage
I think I'll start with this one because it's the first one I read, before Baby K was born. I can't even remember where I heard about it, but I think I read it because I was worried about what our new addition was going to do to our relationship after more than 10 years together. I still have days and weeks when I go back to this one on my iPad, mostly to say to myself, "LK, stop acting like a crazy person to BK and just tell him what you're thinking, or what's bothering you." And that things that feel like a huge deal at the moment really aren't that big of a thing in the end.

Moms on Call
My friend KC recommended these books to me, and I am forever grateful, as they have been a life saver. They are written by two pediatric nurses who have quite a few kids between them. When Baby K was born, I felt like the Swiss were telling me to just go with it, just do what she needs. Umm, I need a little more than that. I just can't. So, at three weeks I started using Moms on Call and haven't stopped yet.

The 0-6 Month book covers sleeping, feeding, schedules, and other basic care that new parents pretty much don't have a clue about.

The 6-15 Month book continues to cover sleeping and feeding (two really important things), moving to solids, a typical routine, and easing into that toddler stage.

The 15 Month to 4 Year book really gets into the nitty gritty of the toddler phase. It does still cover sleep (which I cannot imagine Baby K not sleeping through the night by this point), but also helps a lot with what to do with your cute kid who now is exercising her free will. The whining, tantrums, accidental behaviors, defiant behaviors, and lots of other stuff. I think I write the most about this one because we're in the midst of it now.

Love and Logic
In addition to Moms on Call, now that Baby K is a toddler, I felt like we needed a little more guidance in the area of discipline and kind of what we wanted to do with Baby K. I've known of Love and Logic for a while, but was reminded of it by one of BK's sisters. To put it simply, Love and Logic allows children to grow through their mistakes and learn from the consequences of their actions, ultimately teaching children to learn how to live in the real world. I like the immediate consequences part, as typically in life, someone is not going to warn you 17 times before something actually happens.

That's it- nothing too complicated. I'm not saying it will work for everyone, but these have been our go-to parenting resources. It's worked so far, but we're only 18-months in, so I'm sure we'll add more to our list, but this is what we've started with. Baby K has started nursery school now, so I'm sure we'll have more challenges coming our way, thanks to other kids. Hopefully the resources above will help guide us through and help us figure out what we're doing along the way.