What happens when we get there?

Our first night in Basel and totally clueless!

Now that you know we're moving back to Texas, having baby number two, and going through what feel like a million other transitions at the same time, you may be wondering how we're going to manage all of this. Don't worry, I'm asking myself this same question, and wondering how things will go.

When someone moves abroad it is considered expatriating from your home country; when they move back it's called repatriation. When we moved abroad I was constantly running across articles and blogs that talked about the difficulties of repatriation, or going back "home". At the time, when I was having many days when I felt like my head might literally explode, I could not fathom how this could possibly be the case. But now we're here, and I totally get it.

So how do I really feel about moving back? I think petrified is too strong of a word, but sometimes it feels close to that. Am I happy to be going back to Fort Worth? Absolutely, so please don't take this post as indicating anything else. But do I think it will be difficult? Definitely.

I know you're probably thinking, "But you're coming back to where you came from. How can it be that different?" 

For me, it just feels really different. We've been gone for over three years now. Life has gone on, people have changed, situations have changed, and things have happened in that time. The Fort Worth we left is not the Fort Worth we're going back to. By no means did I think things would stay the same, but I think when we get back I will truly recognize how much things have changed.

I say others have changed, but look at BK and me. When we left, we were two people who had always lived in Texas, near family; were both working; had no kids; went out all the time; and hadn't traveled nearly as much. And now...we've been on our own, where it was just BK and I relying on each other alone; K Bear has joined our family, with Baby H on the way; I haven't worked in three years; we're much more intentional about living life; and have truly discovered how much we love to explore new places. I would say, as individuals we've changed, as a couple we've changed, and as a family- well, that's completely new since we've been abroad.

I've talked some to BK and a little to my parents about this, and I think they worry about me. I don't want you to be worried; I think I'm just trying to prepare myself for when our new reality sets in. I think we'll experience some growing pains as we figure out life in a new neighborhood, new house, new phase of life, new family of four, different relationships with family and friends, new career opportunities- the list goes on and on.

So bear with me if you think I'm a little slow to get on board and seem like I'm fully back "home." It will be a process, but stick with us (me) and we'll get there.

Believe it or not, I am actually counting down the days. Two weeks from tomorrow the movers come and we'll be on our way!